28 septiembre 2010

.kill.

Today, my dad said to me, he was afraid...

afraid of my sister could think about suicide...
he was sorry about i'm charging with her problems "But i've no problems" so... "i should help her"...
so... my mom can hide and pretend that there´s nothing wrong in the family
and him... just forget it...


-sighs-...

but i'm worried for her... and i hate it more...

I've too much things in my head...


i don't have to be worried for something she evident doesn't care

I'm not a good sister, i think i'm not her sister...
i tried to help her... talk with her...
but she doesn't hear me...


sometimes, when i'm a good person... i think about help her till make her see she is doing bad...
sometimes... when i'm a bad person... i just want to make shit her life...

i don't know what to do...

She has everything
a good school
a good job
she's thin
she's tall
she's thin
she's tall
she's thin
she's tall
she's tall... and thin




When i was 17... (she is 17) ... noone told me about the life... about how much i had to fight, noone helped me with all my disorders


Everyone of my family wants to help her, and talk with her...
but she... just lie...(haha) and is FUCKING stupid to lie


but shes doing it bigger and bigger because has shit as brain...
.
.
.
.
This morning was the last time i thought about suicide...
and noone (family) know it...
i've days without eat... and doesn't know it
i've days crying... and doesn't know it...
days without sleep...
i'm in love... and they think i'm too much serious for it... so... they don't know it...
my life is full of disorders...

and i'm glad they don't know it...

since the last month... i've thinking more about suicide
and i'm glad my dad thinks my sister is doing it, and not me...

I'm glad of be the bastard.

6 comentarios:

Mk dijo...

Its hard when you love in silence, but is hardest when you cry in silence.

Nobody can help you, you are alone 'cause you born alone but...
sometimes is hard to help yourself.

So hard when you see a drama queen in her show... On a melodramatic scene about what you really are and nobody notice about your feelings.

Its hard.
But maybe she wants to be more like you
And maybe you want to be a little bit like her.
Sisterhood, you cant deny it.
I dont know
Im gossip
Sorry if it was unnecessary wear and tear.
Thats all

i.kyo.tuzki.u? dijo...
Este comentario ha sido eliminado por el autor.
i.kyo.tuzki.u? dijo...

I'm so... confused...
for this all so...

thanks for comment♥

EK dijo...

no estes confundida, simplemente piensa en quien realmente se hace daño, como tu lo dices ella no tiene grandes problemas, ella misma los agranda, no has pensado en que simplemente lo hace por un poco de atencion ?, es extraña y muy trilla esta idea, pero la mayoria de veces es asi, piensalo, no te preocupes por salvar a los demas salvate tu

ek dijo...

mas cerca de lo que crees

i.kyo.tuzki.u? dijo...

Buena esa...

A veces hay que ser egoistas...

y más en estoy tiempos

Gracias♥